1: Ask Music Director not to call you “Tuba Guy” at orchestra events.
2: Think bigger. My tuba is my power.
3: Commission a Tuba Concerto from a famous composer. Name it, “Thump the Tub.”
4: Convince Music Director to premiere “Thump the Tub” next season. Invite Justin Trudeau and Adrienne Clarkson.
5: Learn how to write a press release and pitch “Thump the Tub” to media outlets. If tuba fame is not attainable, go for tuba recognition.
6: Sell sponsorship logos on the bell. Prove to that the Tuba can be lucrative! (Make trumpets jealous at all costs – showboating pricks)
7: Stop making a mess on the floor with Tuba spit. Buy a cat box.
8: Buy a calendar.
9: Buy a can opener.
10: Eat more Kale
#LUDWIGVAN
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